Rough story, but I'm glad you managed to get out of it. It’s crazy to think that so many people are still using/abusing these, given all the horror stories surrounding them.
Benzos are mild tranquilizers meant to relax you and reduce stress. I was once addicted to benzos after abusing them, often using them while drinking alcohol. Horrible withdrawals, felt like I was dying but worse, sometimes I wanted to die it was so bad. Physically and psychologically addictive. You get sick without taking them once you become addicted, you cannot sleep, eat or think properly without taking them routinely. People can die, and many have died from the addiction. Glad I managed to survive it and never looked back. Will never use benzos ever again. Honestly not worth it, too addictive and breaking that addiction is hell on Earth.
So, one time I took a Xanax to chill out before a big work thing. I thought it’d help me calm down, but like... it hit way harder than I expected. I was sitting there, trying to focus, but my brain just kinda shut off. The words on my screen didn’t make sense, and I couldn’t remember what I was talking about half the time. I felt super spaced out, like I was watching myself do everything but not really doing it. By the end of it, I had no idea what happened. I just wanted to go home and lay down. Honestly, it was kinda scary.